Sunday, January 18, 2009

The First Step is Hardest of All

Checking in here for what is potentially the last entry before I hit the road. I had a great weekend spending time with my mom and friends that have impacted me over the last five years. It was great to have one last hurrah before I leave. I didn't get to see everyone that I wanted too, but in the past 2 weeks I've see most of the people I'm going to miss.

I've found myself in an awkward position. For the first time in my life I'm saying goodbye without knowing when I'll see anybody again. I usually throw out a "See you next time" or "Catch you later," but I felt as though I was lying to people. I don't know when "next time" will be, I'm not sure if there will even be a later. I'm well aware of the fact that I may never see some of these people again.

When someone dies it's easy to understand that you won't see them again. When you break up with a girlfriend, you don't want to see them again. But the people I'm talking about are the ones who I confide in. These are the people I've helped and have helped me back. The guys you want standing next to in the worst of times and the friends you want to be laughing with during the best of times. This is the scariest, yet most refreshing thing about this trip for me. While I am leaving behind several great relationships with great people, I also get the chance to start fresh and open a new chapter in my life. It's easy to walk away from Montgomery; in fact it's a cakewalk. But I fear I'm going to miss the memories, the friends, and the 2 o’clock in the morning runs to Krispy Kreme. I won't have those all nighters in studio that seemed to happen 3 times a week, or the Waffle House "dinners" as the sun rises. I will most likely not be rolling any trees after a victory. I doubt I'll have those conversations on the couch that go on until the wee hours of the morning.

I do however get to see what life has available. I know I will not be the same person in two weeks after this trip. I will be a better endurance driver for sure! There will also be alot of time for self reflection. While I have already written a list of things I want to do in my life (Of which a cross country road trip is one of them....check!), this should also give me the opportunity to evaluation the person that I have become. There are areas in my life where I am not happy, and there are other areas where I don't think I can try harder to be better. This is my chance for a Henry David Thoraeu moment. I don't think he took this trip, but I do think that it is a modern adaptation of simple living in natural surroundings.

There are several people I need to blame for this idea, call it a spark of insanity or a mental leap towards greatness, but it's a complex accusation. While studies of Thoreau and his trip to Maine are a precedent it's really about a desire to see more than I have. I have a list of people from inspiring professors to encouraging friends and family. I would be lying if I said my surroundings and the ambition of the people from this area had no effect. There might even be a slight hint of the desire to prove myself, albeit to people are no longer in my life, but I still know I can take pride in outshining the vision they have/had of me!

P.S. Astoria has been green lighted. I have the keys to the house downtown, complete with a lavender flower key chain! I'm really excited about this, and now I feel indebted to the Wehtje family. I'm told the townsfolk are pleasant, and they should be expecting me. I was even warned that if word got to the chamber of commerce there, they might hang a banner to welcome me! Love it, Small Town, USA!

That is a shipwreck near Astoira. It's
the legendary remains of Peter Iredale.

The Astoria-Megler Bridge over the Columbia River.
Oregon-Washington State Line

Should you feel a strong desire to send a postcard (my favorite momento) I'll give you the address, just ask. I'd love to get some encouragement or even just a memory of something in the past.

As for now, I'll try to up load a few photos from the Anthropology Museum, in Mexico City, take two!

Statue piece with screen detail

Courtyard form the Azteca Gallery

Outdoor recreation of a temple.

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